Who is Up for Competition

i think everyone has been subject to this so-called competition..

i can remember vividly that when i was in elementary i have believed that only thru' winning you will be able to prove your worth..

i have gained a number of friends because one way or another i have excelled in the class and the other things i engaged to (do i sound arrogant? i do not mean that..hehe)

and i have come to realize.. well i can only speak for myself..haha

of course!!! this is my personal experience you know...

i have come to realize that.. the more i struggle to prove myself..

i am inflicting pressures and axieties to myself..

it did not do good actually..

as i grow in age, in weight or in height maybe.. i fortunately grow mature.. may perspective in life has changed drastically for the better..

gone are those days which i act immaturely just to be the best..

gone are those days that i cry when i get mistakes in the quiz..

gone are those days that i cannot sleep getting 83!!!

know why?

because i have fully accepted that: there are a lot of people who are better off than me and undoubtedly i cannot contend to that fact!

competition?

i am not for it..

oh well, maybe i am still up to it.. but this time.. i am competing for myself.. showing who really "malou" is within..

i had a fair share or shall i say i had enough of that so-called competition!!! give me a break..

i have proven myself more than once and i think it's enough!!!

i am so secured of who i am and i am happy on how God has blessed my life.. why would i find a way to make my life miserable by exerting so much effort just to get ahead of others??!!??

right now, i feel that i am ahead of million others because God has been generous to me..

as i see others competing their way up to class..

i just grin and mutter: "been there, done that"..."good luck!"

why am i posting this?

i was just astonished that a month ago, we were told that we were competing in the class..

hehe.. i just smiled coz' i never thought that there was competition existing in class!!!??? it did not cross my mind until it was brought up..

must it be that thinkers are doers??!!??

self-evaluation..

stop projecting your agenda to others..

mwaaaaahugsss!

whew!

feels good to air this out!

finaaaalllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyy i am free!!!